DETOX: a word to inspire fear in men of indulgence…a term which sees life-loving women tear their hair out at the prospect of wanton self-denial. Tomorrow is Day 10 of my detox. Over the past week and a half I’ve met with a surprisingly rabid air of hostility from otherwise mild-mannered friends and acquaintances, alongside a great deal of curiosity. So what’s it like? In a word, shitty.

I don’t feel good. The first three days were great. No caffeine, no sugar, no alcohol, no dairy, no wheat, no red meat. Okay, I’m lying – I drank tea and ate chocolate. But my plan is to slowly wean off the choc & caffeine. On Monday I had 5 cups of black tea and 14 squares of Loving Earth choc - but I didn’t have all that other stuff. On Tuesday I had 4 cups of tea and 20 squares of choc. Wednesday, 3 teas and 10 choc. Though I’d slept badly, I still felt great!!! Bright, clear, full of energy, focused. This detox lark is easy!

Thursday was awful.

I slept badly and felt sluggish, tired, unpresent. I stumbled into work and walked into doors for a couple of hours until I had a cup of black tea and 4 squares of choc around 10.30am, at which stage I miraculously woke up and transformed into my normal self. My final cup of black tea was consumed on Friday. All weekend I was shockingly irritable and drove the poor missus up the wall. Since then I’ve been allowing myself one cup of green tea a day, and I’m working down from 10 squares of choc on Monday to 4 on Sunday. (I’ve already had 4 today. I’m saving the final 4 for 2.30pm. Caramel choc, if you must ask). For the final 10 days of detox it’s absolutely no caffeine and no sugar. Including fructose in fruit (hey – there’s such fanfare about it in the health and wellbeing world, I figure it has to be worth a go).

Right now, I feel no great difference. On the plus side, I feel present and clear. I’m exceptionally articulate in my speech and thought - words leap into my mind to succinctly describe exactly what I’m attempting to express. Emotionally and bodily, however, I feel distinctly “meh”. There’s no great lows…but then again there’s no great highs. So, with 15 days to go, I'm unconvinced – let’s see how I feel by the end. The skeptic in me says “drink and be merry!”. The scientist in me says “wait and see”. This is the first time I’ve concertedly attempted something like this since our Food Diary Project two years ago. I’m less than halfway through, so I need to withhold judgment for now. In the meantime, I had another chat with our Customer Service Manager and nutritionist Rebecca Divjak, attempting to find out whether it’s just me who’s mental or if the issues and queries I’ve been experiencing are common amongst detoxees…click here to read all about it.